Buying a country costs explained? (Know the real prices and factors involved)

So today I randomly thought - wait, how much would it actually cost to buy a whole damn country? Like literally own the place? Saw some clickbait headlines about it yesterday and figured, screw it, let's actually dig deep on this nonsense.

The "Hold My Beer" Research Phase

Started with Google obviously. Typed "buy country cost" like an idiot. Got flooded with sketchy "private island for sale" ads. Zero answers about actual nations. Dug deeper through historical cases - found Liberia sold land to American companies in the 1920s. Made notes. Then remembered that nutjob who declared his backyard the "Sovereign State of Westarctica". Laughed for five minutes straight.

• Checked Caribbean island listings first - saw $200M price tags for tiny rocks with palm trees.
• Searched UN charter Article 2.4 - literally says you can't acquire territory by force like some medieval warlord.
• Got distracted researching Greenland when Trump joked about buying it - Denmark basically told him to pound sand.

Reality Slapped Me Hard

Called my lawyer friend Dave after lunch. His reaction: "You're watching too much Netflix." Explained that nobody sells sovereign nations. At best, you might:

• Lease land long-term from desperate governments
• Buy disputed territories with weak claims
• Get citizenship-by-investment by tossing $150K at some island economy

Tried pricing out a theoretical purchase anyway:

Land: Siberia's $13/acre x Russia's 4B acres = $52 trillion
Infrastructure: Bridges, roads, hospitals? Add $20 trillion easy
Human Cost: Paying off 144 million Russians? Yeah right.

Final "Duh" Moment

Realized even if I became Jeff Bezos 100 times over:

• No legitimate government sells sovereignty
• Citizens would literally revolt before seeing their flag sold
• UN would sanction me into oblivion

Found the only legit way - becoming King of Sealand. That WW2 sea fortress "nation"? Price unknown but probably cheaper than buying Iowa. Still ridiculous. Might just buy Minecraft instead.

TLDR: "Buying countries" is billionaire clickbait nonsense unless you're cool owning micronations the size of a backyard shed.