Alright so I finally got around to messing with that Caligula Sex thing everyone kept whispering about online. Honestly? Total letdown. Here's exactly how my dumb experiment went down.
The Setup Phase
First I grabbed my dusty laptop, fired up Terminal feeling like some hacker movie. Typed in brew install somepackage – waited forever watching that progress bar crawl. Made coffee. Burned my tongue. Real smooth start.
Found this GitHub repo by some rando calling themselves "DigitalEmperor69420". Skimmed the README full of broken English and laughing-crying emojis. Already knew it'd be trash but my curiosity won. Pulled the code down with sweaty palms.
The Broken Experience
Ran the install script. Immediate errors. Of course.
- Tried installing missing dependencies one by one – Python yelled about version conflicts
- The UI looked straight outta Windows 98 with neon pink buttons
- Clicked "Start Ritual" button – spinner just... looped forever
- Checked terminal logs: "ERROR: EmperorNotFound" flashed repeatedly
Closed laptop. Walked to fridge. Ate cold pizza. Came back and saw terminal had crashed completely. Rebooted machine feeling dumb.
The "Solution"
Found some obscure forum post from 2018 telling people to:
- Delete * file
- Run as admin (terrible idea)
- Pray to machine spirits
Did all three. Held breath. Got same damn EmperorNotFound error blinking mockingly.
Uninstalled everything with unnecessary force. Smashed my delete key extra hard. Felt better.
Why This Sucks
Turns out the whole "Caligula Sex" thing? Just vaporware dressed up as forbidden tech. Watched a YouTube deep dive later – it's basically three amateur scripts duct-taped together that:
- Pull random quotes from ancient texts
- Overlay them on stolen Roman bust images
- Play midi trumpet sounds
Zero actual NSFW content. All marketing hype. Even my grandma's crossword app has better code structure. Absolute garbage fire wrapped in clickbait.
Stared at my wall afterwards thinking about time wasted. That pizza wasn't even good. Lesson learned: if it sounds too edgy to be real... it probably runs like dogshit too.
