What Even Are Egyptian Horoscope Signs?
So I stumbled upon this TikTok about Egyptian astrology while doomscrolling last Tuesday. Coffee sloshed everywhere when I jerked upright – turns out Egyptians had zodiac signs WAY before the Greeks slapped animal stickers on star charts. Grabbed my dusty library card and hauled ass to find actual books instead of trusting randos online.
The Bookworm Struggle
Scoured three libraries downtown, zero luck. Librarians kept pointing me to Greek horoscope crap – annoying AF. Finally found this crusty reference section dude who pulled out "Celestial Geometry: Ancient Egypt's Skies". Jackpot! Page 78 showed this wild calendar: Egyptians split years into 36 ten-day chunks with unique constellations. But their zodiac? Only 12 main signs based on Nile flooding seasons. Whole system tied to gods, harvest cycles, river levels – not planet positions.
Here’s what made no damn sense at first:
- Signs start on DIFFERENT dates every year? Nile flood decided the calendar.
- Birthdate ranges overlap modern signs – my July birthday could be 3 options.
- Gods had animal heads but zodiac signs were objects: THOTH is literally an ibis bird scribe, yet represents scales? Make it make sense.
Kitchen-Table Calculation Chaos
Ditched the books and tried online calculators. BIG mistake. Every site demanded Egyptian calendar conversions. Found one with dropdown menus – selected modern dates anyway cause ain’t nobody memorizing Thoth months. Input my birthday July 20.
First result: SETH THE CHAOS GOD. Site said I crave destruction. Hell nah – I cried when my basil plant died last week. Refreshed. Second try got HATHOR COW GODDESS. Description gushed about maternal instincts… I can’t keep cacti alive. Last attempt showed RA THE SUN GOD – felt like they just assigned leftover birthdays.
Rechecked the book’s birth chart. July 20 actually fell under:
- NILE INUNDATION SEASON
- GOD: RA (Jun 21 – Jul 20)
- SYMBOL: SUN DISK
That RA overlap explained why calculators glitched. Realization hit: ancient Egyptians didn’t split birthdays at midnight. Seasons blurred boundaries, so being born on cusp days meant double god influences. My birthday’s the literal last day of RA season before ISIS takes over.
The Final Verdict (Kinda)
Settled on RA as primary sign after cross-referencing 5 sources. Traits? Leadership vibes but also arrogance and sunburns – dead accurate for my lifeguarding summers. Why the headache? Modern calculators treat Egyptian zodiac like Western astrology. Wrong approach. Nile seasons mattered more than precise dates. My solution now:
- Grab your birthday
- Google "Egyptian zodiac seasons"
- Pick the god whose dates cover MOST of your birth month
- If born first/last week? Cheat sheet: Ra/Isis for summer, Osiris/Horus for winter
Pro tip: skip conversion tools unless you’re writing hieroglyphic dissertations. Seasons > star math. Found out my neighbor’s dog has more RA energy than me though – that golden retriever legit stares at sunrises. Maybe Egyptians were onto something.
