How I Started Messing With That Darkness Sword Thing
So yesterday I found this freakin’ big ass sword in my friend’s garage. Looked like some cheap Halloween prop - all black and dusty with chipped paint. Thought nah this can’t be special but grabbed it anyway since it was free. Pro tip: always take free weird stuff.
First Tests Went Nowhere Fast
Got home and waved it around like an idiot. Swung at soda cans - just dented ’em. Whacked my couch - left black marks wife got mad about. Even tried shouting magic words like "abracadabra" while jumping on one foot. Nothing. Felt stupid holding plastic-feeling junk.
The Slip That Changed Everything
Was about to toss it in the dumpster when my dumb ass tripped over the dog. Fell face-first, sword slammed into concrete basement floor. Heard this creepy HMMMMMMMMMM vibration sound. Whole blade started glowing purple like cheap neon sign. Dropped it again ’cause scared the sht outta me.
Discovering Secret Tricks Like Dumb Luck
Turns out you gotta hit it just right to wake it up. Spent hours testing:
- Banged hilt against fence post - made floating dust sparkles
- Smashed tip on brick - sucked all light outta the room
- Dropped pointy end on gravel - projected shadow monsters everywhere
Nearly called cops when shadows moved but realized they just copy your motions. Did fortnite dances with shadow clones lol.
Why This Junk’s Actually Wild
Found way more secrets once started treating it like disobedient tool:
- When angry yell at it? Glows hotter
- Throw in frustration? Absorbs fire
- Ignore for days? Screams when picked up
This thing’s basically moody teenager. Now me and kids play shadow puppet wars in backyard after dark. Scares neighbors but saves on Halloween decorations.
